my first thought upon waking is either “i’d rather die than get out of bed” or “i need pizza right now, like literally right now”
there is no in between
When you have a shitty life like mine, who can blame you for trying to commit suicide?
I want a cafe romance where I come in at the end of his shift every night and we sit and talk til the wee hours of the morning until my eyes are too weak to stay open.
I want a bookstore romance where we both reach for the same novel and a sort of spark ignites from the touch of our hands.
I want a summer fling where we bump into each other and he becomes my personal tour guide, where we’d share our last kiss at the airport.
I want a high school romance where we’re both so in love that it ruins everything else around us.
I want a broken love where we fight on stormy nights and I run out screaming and he comes after me and we forgive by kissing in the rain.
But really, I just want someone to say “I really like you” because I just need to know that I can have my own kind of romance,
I know they say we’re made of stardust
But scientifically speaking,
I’m about 75% water, and the rest
It’s nothing but a mess of fears, doubts and missing you.
And I look up at the stars and wonder
If they too cry until they’re down at their last 10%,
And if they have trouble sleeping because they’re scared
And if, like me, they doubt the world,
And if missing someone hurts worse when they breathe too.
If I could write anything in your birthday card,
I’d tell you that although your smile doesn’t always reach your eyes, when it does, it’s beautiful.
Yes, I meant beautiful. Handsome is not a big enough word to describe your intensity.
I’d tell you that running my fingers through your hair and sweeping it to the side is one of my favorite pastimes, and tracing the constellations in the freckles on your arms is better than any night sky.
I’d say that your laugh gives me more self confidence than I will ever need and your determinism and perfectionist ways are so utterly frustrating while being so utterly adorable.
However, when you open your birthday card tomorrow, in front of your friends and family, it will say three things:
Thank you for being you.
Thank you for helping me.”